What I didn't expect, when preparing to interview Alison Oliver, the star of BBC Three’s Conversations With Friends, was to instead be face to face with millennial ‘author of a generation’ Sally Rooney, whose novel of the same name the show is based on. But, for a moment, I thought that was the case, as my interviewee appeared on-screen via Zoom, all clear, pale, make-up free complexion, her dark-hair tied back with a side-swept fringe, wearing plain black wool jumper and classic denim jeans – a dead ringer for Sally Rooney herself.
It seems this quiet, understated prettiness is a trademark aesthetic for Rooney heroines, Normal People’s Marianne (played by Daisy Edgar-Jones in the TV adaptation) being one example, and Beautiful World, Where Are You’s Eileen – a wan, dark-haired literary magazine assistant – another). But, as soon as we get chatting, I can tell Alison Oliver, who plays protagonist Frances in Conversations With Friends, is very much her own person outside of the ‘Rooney-verse’ – a talented rising star for whom this breakout role is just the beginning.
Although thoughtful and softly-spoken, Alison comes across first and foremost as warm and passionate; almost illuminated from within by the sheer delight of having scored her leading part straight out of drama school – she got the news the day she graduated. The 25-year-old actress is currently talking to me from her childhood bedroom in Cork, where she’s retreated after back-to-back projects (after finishing Conversations With Friends, she went on to film Jack Thorne’s latest drama Best Interests alongside Sharon Horgan and Michael Sheen).
Despite the big break, the rise to fame hasn’t been entirely straightforward for Alison, who was asked to take a year-long foundation course in drama before she was allowed to take up her place at The Lir – which, for the uninitiated, is a prestigious drama school affiliated with Trinity College Dublin, first established in 2011. More recently, The Lir has become an unofficial feeder school for televised adaptations of Sally Rooney novels. According to a special page on the school’s website, no less than nine alumni, including Paul Mescal, starred in Normal People, with several others (including Alison) in Conversations With Friends. Alison’s boyfriend, Éanna Hardwicke, was also in Normal People – playing Connell’s friend Rob.
After then going on to score her breakout part, Alison had another set-back: the pandemic, which meant filming was moved from December 2020 (she was cast the previous October) to April 2021. Was it frustrating to be cooped up – the pressure building – unable to start in-person rehearsals with her co-stars (which include actor Joe Alwyn, the boyfriend of Taylor Swift, and Girls actress Jemima Kirke)? Not for Alison, who describes it as a “blessing in disguise” – and loved being able to do a deep dive into the scripts, together with countless re-reads of Rooney’s original novel. “I actually loved having that much time to digest Frances’ whole interior life,” she tells me.
In this conversation for GLAMOUR, Alison goes into more depth about preparing for her debut television role. We also discuss the themes of the show, including polyamory; the frustration of digital-based communication (much of Frances’ dynamic with love interest Nick is via email and text) – and the technical difficulty, as an actor, of portraying that on screen; plus, exactly what it’s like to be a member of the so-called “Rooney-verse.”
Congratulations on this breakout role for you. I read that you found out you got the part the morning you graduated… What was that like?
I’d just finished college and I was like, OK, I’d better get some sort of a job to pay my rent. But I was still waiting to hear back from the audition… When it happened, I was like, I cannot believe this. I feel so lucky to have been given this opportunity and the privilege of playing Frances and being in the Sally Rooney world is just a dream for any actor.
You had a lot of time to think about your character, Frances, when filming went on hiatus during the pandemic. Did you notice any parallels between you and your character?
I've learned a lot from Frances. She's just so brave and I admire her quietness. Sometimes we talk about being introverted or being quiet as a negative thing. What I admire is how, [Frances] doesn't have anything to say, she won't say it – she won't speak for the sake of speaking. I’ve definitely learned from that.
There are always traits you relate to in a character, but what I’ve found most enjoyable is just getting to look at her as a separate person to me and really learning her journey and her experience of life. She’s an incredible, vulnerable character. We don't see a lot of her backstory on screen, but she grew up in such an unstable home with an alcoholic father. It makes so much sense that she struggles with communication and spends a lot of time on her own. And that she’s fearful of being let down again, or the pain that relationships may cause her, because she's had the experience of that before.
I think that the relationships, say with Bobby, also felt recognisable to me: that intense female friendship. You find so much identity and validation in your best friends (and obviously they have that added layer, of the romantic element). Frances had such a lonely childhood. When Bobby comes along and – as she says in the story – “invents her, gives her a personality” – she comes alive.
Much of Nick and Frances’ relationship develops via email and text message – how did you cope with the challenge of portraying digital communication on screen?
It’s a funny one, because it's true of our lives right now: so much of our relationships and contact between people is developed online, via email or text message. So you can definitely relate to the frustration of, for instance, getting a message that just says “OK”. Things like that – I thought, oh, I know what that’s like. What’s difficult is that, when you do those scenes, the phone screen is often just black – because of camera glare – and then they will add the on-screen elements in post production. So if it’s a specific back and forth, you’ll often be checking your script, like, “What is it he’s texting me with?” It’s a funny one. But that part of the story is such a good vehicle for driving the relationships on. And you can do so much storytelling through just a response or a look – which portrays the feeling that that message makes you feel.
How about your own experiences – have you been on the receiving end of an unsatisfying text message exchange before?
I mean, we've probably all been “OK-ed”! For Frances, she’s definitely in those early stages of her relationship with Nick, and she’s confused about where they stand and how he feels about her. She's doing that classic thing – that I’ve definitely done – when you feel someone's slipping away, and you’re quite short with them because you're trying to take back the power, you know? And it's like… each person is just being less and less and less until the point where she’s kind of like, I don't know if there's anything here. It’s one of those things we all do, so it makes all of those text and email-based moments painful and real.
One of the central questions of Conversations With Friends is ‘Can you love more than one person romantically?’ – and polyamory is a strong theme running through the narrative. Did you speak to any polyamorous individuals in order to research the part?
It wasn’t so much research, but I definitely have friends who have felt those feelings before, so I had an openness to the idea. It wasn't too difficult to understand how you could love two people, and how different relationships can give you different things. The emotion of that is actually quite simple. Like I have love for two people, but the constructs we've been taught are that the way to love someone is through monogamy.
What makes it quite complicated is what society expects of us in a relationship. When you think about it, the idea there can only be one definitive relationship is actually quite stark. Hopefully, through this story, people will feel like that you are allowed to be more open in how you love and who you love. This story doesn’t label those things, whether it's gender, or how many people, or sexuality or anything. Sally just embeds those ideas into the character's narratives – like how both Nick and Frances realise they love two people. And we just get to watch them on that journey, and explore the different outcomes of what that could mean for them. Like, should Nick leave Melissa, should him and Frances end their relationship, or could they make it work in an open situation? And how does this affect Frances’ relationship with Bobby? It all comes to play. There’s a lovely fluidity about it, but the drive is for love and connection.
You’re currently in your mid-twenties, while your character, Frances, is 21, and Nick is 31 . Do you think there’s an intergenerational gap between how we view polyamory – for instance, is it more normal for those currently in their twenties than it might have been previously?
That's an interesting question, because I definitely feel like the generation that I'm in, or certainly the one below me, have an amazing openness to life. Barriers are being broken down and people are much more allowed to live life how they want to live it. There's definitely a drive towards being less judge-y of who you want to love. Obviously, in our story, that brings a lot of complications because Nick is married, and the affair damages the relationship between Bobby and Frances. But I’ve had people say to me, “It makes me feel OK about how I feel.” And I think anything that opens up a conversation and makes people feel understood, that’s brilliant. So maybe it is a generational thing, but also I think it’s just, hopefully, a more open kind of acceptance in the world.
Your boyfriend, Éanna Hardwicke, is also part of the Rooney-verse, having played Rob in Normal People. What’s it like having that in common – are you ever tempted to chat about Sally Rooney 24/7?
I wouldn’t say that! But, you know, because we both went to The Lir, so many of our friends from college are actually in the Rooney-verse too. So it’s this lovely thing we all got to experience together – this similar world.
So it’s a whole subset of the alumni! You could have a Rooney party, then – where you all just sit around drinking wine and reading to each other…
And wearing Doc Martens! Actually, that would be really fun. Maybe one day.
Conversations with Friends is out now. All episodes are available to stream on BBC One, BBC Three and BBC iPlayer for UK viewers.
ncG1vNJzZmivp6x7qLjApqauqp2WtKLGyKecZ5ufY8Kse8Crq6KbnJp8pLvNr5yrq5GptrC60mauoqyYYrOztcSnm6xlkaG2tLvNZqaloaaav261za2cq66ZmsQ%3D